Few things really interest me anymore, not because I’m morbidly bored or extremely arrogant, but simply because everything is so over explained and dissected, thanks to the web, that not too many topics can be considered “new” anymore...and that goes even when we deal with the political establishment.
Politicians act all the same, use the same jargon, have similar modus operandi.
Their actions can always be predicted: deny, promise, assure, mystify and find a sacrificial lamb (those really gifted can also mix them up in different sequences).
That means that they are all pretty much the same when it comes down to what they “do”, but they usually have some visual or acoustic distinguishing traits that allow them to stand out from each other: weird glasses, extravagant ties, racial hatred, tax fixation, funny accent, criminal history and so forth.
With some particular groups of people, though, this sort of trademarks are meaningless, redundant: they are so “out there” that you just feel dumbfounded with each and every single word that comes out of their mouth, even when they are speaking about totally neutral topics...or when they are trying to be inspirational, like Umberto Bossi: "It’s not hard to dream. What is hard, though, is to dream confronting reality in order to change it".
You can’t tell if it’s just the raving of a lunatic or a clever attempt to say a pretty nonsense, just to fuck with the people that pay his salary.
Or maybe they can access knowledge that can’t be grasped by a commoner, like me: that’s why, probably, all of those who are not aligned with them are called “commies”...
When I think about a meeting of the leaders of the political Italian party “Lega Nord”, I always picture in my mind a big room, wooden walls adorned with ancient shields from ancient battlefields, beer, grappa ...and no designated drivers.
I also imagine a big table, a big hearth with a boar roasting in it and a very animate conversation concerning the future of the country...and how that future is undermined by the primordial evil, plotting and scheming to take over Italy.
Bossi: “We need to find a name to this new kind of evil we are facing...and also somebody check if the dinner is ready...”
Maroni: “I have an idea!”
Bossi: “Shut the fuck up Roberto, you speak when you are told”
Maroni: “I am Minister of the Interior! I outrank you!”
Bossi: “Not here. You still lack the first requirement to have freedom of speech among the Chosen Ones. Borghezio, tell us what’s the requirement, so Roberto can remember...and practice.”
Borghezio: “The Everlasting Boner, sir!”
Bossi: “That’s right. The EVERLASTING BONER...so..Do you have it, Minister of the Interior?”
Maroni: “Well...”
Bossi: “Do you have it?”
Maroni: “Do you mean, like... now?”
Bossi: “What part of everlasting don’t you understand?”
Maroni: “It’s just that we are all dudes...”
Bossi: “Don’t fuck with me, boy! How are we supposed to fight against the invading forces of the Alien Faggots from Outer Padania if our dicks aren’t always ready for a fight? Do you have any idea what their cocks are like?”
Maroni: “Erm...”
Calderoli: “I know it, sir.”
Bossi : “Speak up, soldier.”
Calderoli: “They are big, they are black....shaven also...and they are stealing our jobs. Some say they can see into the future too.”
Bossi: “Outstanding, soldier. You win a gold star.”
Calderoli: “Hurray!...”
Bossi: “So, Roberto...do you understand how important it is to have our boners on 24/7? Or are you finally revealing yourself as the pansy I’ve always thought you were?...”
Maroni: “NO SIR. I understand. And as we speak I am hardening my penis with the love for my people, and no one else.”
Bossi: “Those are great words, but are they the truth?...Castelli!”
Castelli: “Yes, sir!”
Bossi: “Check if Maroni has actually a boner!”
....
Castelli: “...What...?”
Bossi: “Touch-Maroni’s-penis-in-order-to-ascertain-the-validity-of-his-statement. Did I stutter?”
Castelli: “No, it’s that...eerm...I’m allergic!...to...men’s crotch!”
Bossi: “Oh, for crying out loud, you pansies! Come here Roberto! Let’s see your boner!”
Maroni: “WHAT??!! NO FUCKING WAY! If I tell you I have a boner, just fucking trust me, okay?!”
Bossi: “I’m surrounded by faggots...all right...I trust you...but just for this time and because I know you since you were young...Renzo!”
Renzo: “Yes dad?”
Bossi: “How’s the boar roasting?”
Renzo: “Thanks to the fire, dad.”
Bossi: “Excellent.”
That’s how I imagine them, all in green (it’s the new black, after all...), all with boners all the time, using their immense force of will to make sure that not all the blood goes to their penises, but it gets evenly distributed between their limbs and their brains, so they can come up with the master plan to save Italy from certain doom...and The Commie-Black-Alien- Southerner-Job stealer-Fake God worshiper-Fag THREAT!
P.S. for those who don’t know/don’t remember Umberto Bossi actually stated that all of Lega Nord followers have a “hard-on” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oUIRdQhjFdM&feature=related ).
Showing posts with label italy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label italy. Show all posts
Monday, October 4, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Politics
With the upcoming elections for the Mayor here in Venice the “political weather” is cloudy with the chance of shit-storms (to paraphrase a recent movie).
The problem is, though, that everyone seems to focus on the actual height of one of the candidates than actually focusing on the fact that he is going to be guilty of the exact thing he claims he's trying to fight as Minister for Public Administration and Innovation: absenteeism.
And, nation-wide, he is one of the good ones: and for “good” I mean “with no criminal records”.
The fact that there's a good chance that this power-addicted little Minister (and by “little” I mean he is the head of a secondary Ministry, and not that he's ridiculously tiny) is going to be elected doesn't really bother me for one reason: I've lost my faith in politics when I started thinking with my own mind and found out what politics actually is.
Politics is, with whoring, the most ancient trade of the so called “civilized world”.
Remember Athens from the history books?
Remember how democracy started there?
It started when a guy called Cleisthenes decided to overthrow Hippias the Tyrant, son of Peisistratus (the man who said “let's write this down” while pointing at a guy who was chanting the Odissey in a tavern), and to acomplish that he did what in my opinion is the very foundation of modern politics: he bribed the high Priestess of Delphi to “persuade” (read: “do it or the gods will smack your silly arse from here to eternity”...) the Spartans to help him in his campaign.
Little detail: Cleisthenes's daddy built the new temple of Delphi...how fortunate for Cleisthenes, right?...
With this I'm not saying a tyrant is better than a thousands corrupted politicians, even though we must keep in mind that the concept of tyranny in those days was very different from the one we have nowadays.
All I'm saying is that politicians were a bunch of power-seeking dogs since the beginning of modern times and it shouldn't surprise anyone if the system is corrupted to the extent that nothing we can do or no one we can vote for would ever be able to change anything.
Not even the impending climatic doomsday is good enough a reason for them to sit and talk solutions: they are just too much worried for their own dirty interests to do shit about it.
They are actually waiting for the oil supply to run off because that's the only way they can squeeze every last penny out of it.
So, at this point, one can argue: what kind of stupid man would just stand up and say “politics is shit, the system has not worked since the beginning and our way of life and our very own lives are in jeopardy because the ruling class is actually far from interested in the greater good” without presenting a solution?
Well, I am.
And you know why?
Because there is no solution.
The human race has taken the wrong turn far too many centuries ago to be able to take the right exit now: politics, religions, wars and racial hatred fucked us up for good, all of us, in a way that goes way more deeper than our rationality and we can not come up with a solution simply because we are way too deep in the mud of our history.
And, let's face it, we have a pretty messed up history.
There was some good, but obviously not enough.
So what I'm saying is very radical and maybe a little crazy but bear with me, I'm almost finished. Next time you go express your preference for an election think about this: what would YOU do (and I mean REALLY do, not just some hypocritical bullshit like “if I was in charge I would clean up this town”) if you were to be elected?
I think that deep inside, when you have really thought it through you would realize that we are at this juncture in history just because we deserved it.
We deserved Bush, we deserved Berlusconi, we deserved Sarkozy.
Why?
Because, as Aristotle once wrote, man is “zoòn politicòn”, a political animal: I really believe that he was right and if I was an animal I would be so fucking offended by it.
We invented politics, but politics also reinvented our kind and now we have to deal with the consequences of our creation.
The shit-storm is always up ahead...
The problem is, though, that everyone seems to focus on the actual height of one of the candidates than actually focusing on the fact that he is going to be guilty of the exact thing he claims he's trying to fight as Minister for Public Administration and Innovation: absenteeism.
And, nation-wide, he is one of the good ones: and for “good” I mean “with no criminal records”.
The fact that there's a good chance that this power-addicted little Minister (and by “little” I mean he is the head of a secondary Ministry, and not that he's ridiculously tiny) is going to be elected doesn't really bother me for one reason: I've lost my faith in politics when I started thinking with my own mind and found out what politics actually is.
Politics is, with whoring, the most ancient trade of the so called “civilized world”.
Remember Athens from the history books?
Remember how democracy started there?
It started when a guy called Cleisthenes decided to overthrow Hippias the Tyrant, son of Peisistratus (the man who said “let's write this down” while pointing at a guy who was chanting the Odissey in a tavern), and to acomplish that he did what in my opinion is the very foundation of modern politics: he bribed the high Priestess of Delphi to “persuade” (read: “do it or the gods will smack your silly arse from here to eternity”...) the Spartans to help him in his campaign.
Little detail: Cleisthenes's daddy built the new temple of Delphi...how fortunate for Cleisthenes, right?...
With this I'm not saying a tyrant is better than a thousands corrupted politicians, even though we must keep in mind that the concept of tyranny in those days was very different from the one we have nowadays.
All I'm saying is that politicians were a bunch of power-seeking dogs since the beginning of modern times and it shouldn't surprise anyone if the system is corrupted to the extent that nothing we can do or no one we can vote for would ever be able to change anything.
Not even the impending climatic doomsday is good enough a reason for them to sit and talk solutions: they are just too much worried for their own dirty interests to do shit about it.
They are actually waiting for the oil supply to run off because that's the only way they can squeeze every last penny out of it.
So, at this point, one can argue: what kind of stupid man would just stand up and say “politics is shit, the system has not worked since the beginning and our way of life and our very own lives are in jeopardy because the ruling class is actually far from interested in the greater good” without presenting a solution?
Well, I am.
And you know why?
Because there is no solution.
The human race has taken the wrong turn far too many centuries ago to be able to take the right exit now: politics, religions, wars and racial hatred fucked us up for good, all of us, in a way that goes way more deeper than our rationality and we can not come up with a solution simply because we are way too deep in the mud of our history.
And, let's face it, we have a pretty messed up history.
There was some good, but obviously not enough.
So what I'm saying is very radical and maybe a little crazy but bear with me, I'm almost finished. Next time you go express your preference for an election think about this: what would YOU do (and I mean REALLY do, not just some hypocritical bullshit like “if I was in charge I would clean up this town”) if you were to be elected?
I think that deep inside, when you have really thought it through you would realize that we are at this juncture in history just because we deserved it.
We deserved Bush, we deserved Berlusconi, we deserved Sarkozy.
Why?
Because, as Aristotle once wrote, man is “zoòn politicòn”, a political animal: I really believe that he was right and if I was an animal I would be so fucking offended by it.
We invented politics, but politics also reinvented our kind and now we have to deal with the consequences of our creation.
The shit-storm is always up ahead...
Friday, September 4, 2009
LA SOLITA TEMPISTICA, PROPRIO OGGI CHE VOLEVO SCRIVERE UN MANIFESTO SOVVERSIVO
Oscuramento internet - E' passato l'emendamento D'Alia
LEGGETE E FATE GIRARE, E' IMPORTANTE PER TUTTI
L’attacco finale alla democrazia è iniziato! Berlusconi e i suoi sferrano il colpo definitivo
alla libertà della rete internet per metterla sotto controllo.
Ieri nel voto finale al Senato che ha approvato il cosiddetto pacchetto sicurezza (disegno
di legge 733), tra gli altri provvedimenti scellerati come l’obbligo di denuncia per i medici
dei pazienti che sono immigrati clandestini e la schedatura dei senta tetto, con un
emendamento del senatore Gianpiero D’Alia (UDC), è stato introdotto l‘articolo 50-bis,
“Repressione di attività di apologia o istigazione a delinquere compiuta a mezzo internet“. Il
testo la prossima settimana approderà alla Camera. E nel testo approdato alla Camera
l’articolo è diventato il nr. 60. Anche se il senatore Gianpiero D’Alia (UDC) non fa parte
della maggioranza al Governo, questo la dice lunga sulla trasversalità del disegno liberticida
della “Casta” che non vuole scollarsi dal potere.
In pratica se un qualunque cittadino che magari scrive un blog dovesse invitare a
disobbedire a una legge che ritiene ingiusta, i provider dovranno bloccarlo. Questo
provvedimento può obbligare i provider a oscurare un sito ovunque si trovi, anche se
all’estero. Il Ministro dell’interno, in seguito a comunicazione dell’autorità giudiziaria, può
disporre con proprio decreto l’interruzione della attività del blogger, ordinando ai fornitori
di connettività alla rete internet di utilizzare gli appositi strumenti di filtraggio necessari
a tal fine. L’attività di filtraggio imposta dovrebbe avvenire entro il termine di 24 ore. La
violazione di tale obbligo comporta una sanzione amministrativa pecuniaria da euro 50.000 a
euro 250.000 per i provider e il carcere per i blogger da 1 a 5 anni per l’istigazione a
delinquere e per l’ apologia di reato, da 6 mesi a 5 anni per l’istigazione alla disobbedienza
delle leggi di ordine pubblico o all’odio fra le classi sociali. Immaginate come potrebbero
essere ripuliti i motori di ricerca da tutti i link scomodi per la Casta con questa legge? Si
stanno dotando delle armi per bloccare in Italia Facebook, Youtube, il blog di Beppe Grillo e
tutta l’informazione libera che viaggia in rete e che nel nostro Paese è ormai l’unica fonte
informativa non censurata. Vi ricordo che il nostro è l’unico Paese al mondo, dove una media
company, Mediaset, ha chiesto 500 milioni di risarcimento a YouTube. Vi rendete conto?
Quindi il Governo interviene per l’ennesima volta, in una materia che vede un’impresa del
presidente del Consiglio in conflitto giudiziario e d’interessi. Dopo la proposta di legge
Cassinelli e l’istituzione di una commissione contro la pirateria digitale e multimediale che
tra poco meno di 60 giorni dovrà presentare al Parlamento un testo di legge su questa
materia, questo emendamento al “pacchetto sicurezza” di fatto rende esplicito il progetto
del Governo di “normalizzare” il fenomeno che intorno ad internet sta facendo crescere un
sistema di relazioni e informazioni sempre più capillari che non si riesce a dominare.
Obama ha vinto le elezioni grazie ad internet? Chi non può farlo pensa bene di censurarlo e
di far diventare l’Italia come la Cina e la Birmania.
Oggi gli unici media che hanno fatto rimbalzare questa notizia sono stati Beppe Grillo dalle
colonne del suo blog e la rivista specializzata Punto Informatico.
Fate girare questa notizia il più possibile. E’ ora di svegliare le coscienze addormentate
degli italiani. E’ in gioco davvero la democrazia!!
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